ATTN: EVERYONE

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

This is your regular medical briefing because some of us still believe in government transparency! :D :D :D

Three news bulletins:

1. So it looks like the Sampire has been repodded. Please welcome our new head of medical, Dr. Faiza Hussain! She's now the person who gets to deal with us, keep us in line, and try to explain the logic behind not using a red cross as a logo because I'm seriously not getting it, man. Is it a copyright issue? Because AFAIK 21st century copyright laws got Ohmified and by that I mean deaded.

2. If you don't present for your physical evaluation, we're going to hunt you down. You can't run. You can't hide. You can only surrender. So do it.

3. WE DISSECTED A SHRIKE AND IT WAS AWESOME. And by awesome I mean freaky because it turns out the thing is still partially alive. The brain was still receiving messages from an external source, leading to increased temperature, trace amounts of blood flow and oh yeah, brain activity. Reminder: this thing was frozen and dead when we started taking it apart. What this signal is or what it is does, and how much danger us noble dissectors were in when we did it, is up to Neuropathy to decide.

So this is your takeaway message: even if an Ohm shrike is dead, it still has an active part of its brain responding to some sort of remote signal.

CREEPY, RIGHT?

This has been your learning moment for the day. If anyone wants to see my incredibly detailed lab notes on the dissection process, including drawings of the Ohm and of Godzilla stomping on NYC, pop on by and I promise to be 50% less of a jackass to you as I usually am. Because science is cool.

Peace out.

Comments

[encourage]

HTML?

Anyway, I have the video up in the media library too, though there's no audio feed.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Yes. It's a shame, because we were singing opera. Now no one will ever hear our stunning performance.

[encourage]

We're not kidding about hunting you down. I take immense pleasure in ensuring you're found, just as Howard, Soren, and possibly Dr. Faiza does. And everyone else.

In order to be an effective medical unit, we need to know the ins and outs of you, at your current status. Wise up. Running away keeping whatever you think is being kept secret or safe or sound is stupid.

Stupid.

Howard how do I make that like, bold?

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Like this, [b]Chakra Spice[/b]. Switch the brackets for those plus-minus Pac-Man signs.

[snarkingscribe]

I suppose I should get around to that medical exam thing. Eheh. Got a little distracted after waking up here.

Does this include pets? 'Cause I'm not sure if mine is valid for a check-up, a tune-up, or both...

What kind of logo are you using? I know back home medical stuff generally had a cross logo of some kind on it. Wasn't red, but still.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

If you're game for having me look you over, just let me know when and I'll be there. If you want a nicer medic you'll have to talk to them, but I can promise you quality service free of bullshit.

I actually know a chick who might be able to take a look at your pet. Unfortunately Medical isn't so hot in that regard. You should have seen me freak when my cat was in heat.

...I have no idea what logo we're using but it's probably hard to draw.

[encourage]

Pets can be, yes. I trained and worked with animals before people, so while exotics I'll need to brush up on, I can help with animal healthcare and maintenance with a little extra study-time.

[9tailedtemptress]

Hm, can I just flee for the sake of being hunted? I do enjoy challenges and it's been rather dull as of late!

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

...I hate people like you.

[soulinherfists]

Whoa that is CRAZY.

Have you been able to find out where the signal is coming FROM?? I definitely want to see those notes!

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Nope, that's up to Neuropathy. But you can come by and see my notes in the Med Bay. I'm not supposed to take medical records out of the zone, even if it's for bad guys. Who are dead.

[facepunching]

Honestly, I prefer the staff with the serpent on it. Or perhaps that red crescent moon.

[encourage]

I'd settle for an armband easier to recognise at a distance at this point. Something unifying, it doesn't need to be a symbol so much as an at-a-glance reminder for all of us involved.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

I prefer cartoon ambulances.

[Locked to Sakura]

[oh_itsasnake]

Learning anything interesting? You must be flooded with a veritable wealth of knowledge... especially biological idiosyncrasies of powers and abilities...

klasdfj LMF WHAT IS THAT ICON still locked

[encourage]

You're right. I am. It's all very interesting. I've never been so avidly entertained in my whole life.

[zouichi]

This new chipper Howard is a little disconcerting.

However, I'd be interested in looking at your notes.

[locked to Zouichi]

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

I'm not being chipper. I've just decided that since everyone always treats me like an idiot on the comms anyway, I might as well forget about being even a little bit polite.

One thesis on Ohm anatomy coming your way!

[zombiewolf]

A medical examination would be an exercise in pointlessness. I will save you the time having to track me down and simply say that none of your craft would be of use to me.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Big whoop. Show up anyway or we'll kidnap you.

[warriorraceguy]

Regarding item 3:

This could be useful. If we can break into the Ohm's communications and decipher the signals it would be invaluable intelligence.

It is just my hope that it does not lead them to us.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Take it up with Neuropathy. They're the ones who have the brain right now.

But believe me, these worst case scenario ideas have totally crossed my mind.

[thebestoffense]

i am healthy and pretty much do not think i need to be evaluated?

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Too fucking bad.

[couldputitback]

Thank you, Howard.

For those who are avoiding their evaluation, please realize that coming to medical and allowing us to do what we need to is in everybody's best interests. Our only interest in this is to keep the crew healthy and it makes it easier for us to treat injuries. As much as I dislike it, the fact of the matter is that we have been drafted for a war. None of us was asked if we wanted to fight, but we are here anyway.

And for those of us in Medical, part of that is making certain that everybody stays alive and in good health.

I would also note that we are open to anybody who has medical training in their own world, or who are open to learning. Much of the medical staff is human, but we would be very happy to have more diverse representation within the department and are happy to teach anybody who wants to learn.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Just as long as whoever new we hire doesn't take all my shifts, boss.

[hit_girl_mindy]

And you keep all this stuff confidential?

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Yes. Because sharing is not caring when it comes to private medical information.

[moltenman]

Terrific. [sarcastic]

About 3 though... You sure that there's nothing leading the Ohm to Stacy?

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Nope, I'm not sure of anything! :D

Take it up with Neuropathy. They're too important to talk to us teenage medics.

[thereisno11]

I'm a damned ghost, so it doesn't apply to me.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Yes it does, so deal with it.

[psipunching]

Government transparency? Is everyone in the government invisible or something?

I don't know about creepy, but that sounds AWESOME to me. I've seen brains survive without a body, so it's not all that weird, is it?

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

That means people try to keep the number of bullshit secrets to a minimum.

...Yeah, it's kind of weird.