terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling T9

[laughsassinate]

ThEsE PoCkEt cOmPuTeR OmNiCoM WhIrLiGiGgLeS ArE PrEtTy fUcKiN TiGhT AnD i'M StArTiNg tO GeT ThE MoThErFuCkIn hAnG On hOw tHeSe tHiNgS WoRk. DoEsN'T MaKe aNy sEnSe bUt wHeN ThE FuCk dId cOmPuTeRs eVeR Do tHaT?
i wAs gOnNa pOsT SoMeThInG EaRlIeR BuT I WaS BeInG WaY ToO MoThErFuCkInG SpAcEd oUt bEfOrE I CoUlD... aH WeLl, It's nO BiG DeAl.
So I'm bAsIcAlLy aLl pOsTiNg sHiT Up jUsT To tHrOw a bIg wElCoMe fRoM Me tO AlL My mOtHeRfUcKiNg cOmRaDeS Up hErE In tHiS FlOaTiNg SpAcEsHiP In sPaCe, WhAt aLsO HaPpEnS To bE A FrIeNdLy-sOuNdInG LaDy sOmEhOw, ShIt... jUsT OnE MiRaClE AfTeR AnOtHeR. i'M gAmZeE. :o) HoNk HoNk!
i'M HoPiN We cOuLd aLl gEt tO KnOw eAcH OtHeR SoMeTiMe. YoU KnOw, KiCk tHe fUcK BaCk aNd cRaCk oPeN A BoTtLe oF RuDe eLiXiR FoR PaSsInG ArOuNd bUt i'm fReSh oUtTa tHe sTuFf sO ThAt cAn't bE HaPpEnInG I GuEsS. :o( iT'S AlL GoOd tHoUgH, wE CaN GeT AlOnG WiThOuT.

i gOt sOmE FrIeNdS YoU ShOuLd tOtAlLy gEt yOuR MeEt oN FoR ToO. iF YoU KnOw kArKaT, wElL He's mY BeSt mOtHeRfUcKiNg fRiEnD I'vE GoT. We gO BaCk pReTtY FaR I ThInK, hAhA. hE MaY Be lOuD AnD LiKe tO ShOuT AlL ThE MoThErFuCkInG TiMe bUt hE'S ChIlL WhErE It rEaLlY CoUnTs.
AnD ThEn tHeRe's tAvRoS AnD We'rE PrEtTy mOtHeRfUcKiN LoCkEd tIgHt uP In tHiS FrIeNdShIp bUsInEsS ToO. hE'S ReAl eNtHuSiAsTiC AbOuT A LoT Of tHe sTuFf hE LiKeS AnD FuUuUuUcK CaN He dIsH OuT A FrEsH OrDeR Of rHyMeS.

So uH, tHaT'S AlL I CaN ThInK To sAy. PeAcE OuT BrOtHeRs.

Comments

[420boondolla]

You mean like what's done with fruit growing on trees? Shiiiit bro you tuggin my horn! Honk!
Man though I gotta get my see on of this. Sounds like some kind of magic motherfuckin miracle.

[zouichi]

[Horn...?]

Yeah, I think that's the general idea. I've never really tried it myself, but the general consensus is that it's pretty good. And if nothing else, well... I haven't seen a Beer Tree anywhere else in the multiverse.

[laughsassinate]

Can't say I've ever tried the shit neither. Hey... I wonder if they're all fuckin having Faygo grow off trees too?
That would be like the motherfuckin cherry on top of this miracle pie.
It's been far too fuckin long so much that I forgot when was the last I felt that plastic neck between my motherfuckin fingers.

[zouichi]

Faygo? Never heard of it.

[420boondolla]

Hey that's cool. It's like this wicked motherfuckin drink I like to sip all the motherfuckin time. Comes in soooo many fuckin sugary flavors that I lost track of them all. Shame I don't got any on me, or else I'd totally be all for passing you a swig!

[zouichi]

Hmm. I don't need a lot of fluids, but if it comes that highly recommended, I guess I can try it if I ever run into any.

[420boondolla]

You so fuckin should! Maybe a miracle will happen, who knows.
By the way... I don't think I ever caught your name, bro.

[zouichi]

It's Zouichi. Kanoe Zouichi.

Well, if it's as good as they say, maybe we'll find it on another shore leave planet. I know Splicer stocks up on his cigarettes every time we stop.

[laughsassinate]

Kay. I'll try to remember but no promises. I'll get it eventually.
That would make me the motherfucking most happiest dude if me and the Faygo could reconvene somehow. Who's this Splicer guy?

[zouichi]

Well... I'm sure you'll know him when you see him. He's got shaggy hair, he's constantly smoking, and he carries three dolls around.

[laughsassinate]

Dolls you say? Sure sounds like one kooky motherfucker. Maybe he just likes dolls a whole lot?

[zouichi]

Well... they're old friends of his, apparently. I didn't ask too much into detail.